It's time to make a confession!
Have you ever said anything like this?
- "I hate being single. I want to connect with people I'm attracted to, but I just freeze up and can't do it."
- "I'm depressed all the time. I want to feel better and be more positive, but I can't help how I feel or all the negative thoughts in my head."
- "I just procrastinate. I need to work harder so I can be more successful, but I can't motivate myself."
- "I can't control my emotions. I want to be more calm and relaxed, but I just get so stressed. Then, I lash out at the people I love."
- "I want to connect with the people I care about and can't. It seems like the harder I try, the more I push them away."
- "I want to get fit and feel good about my body, but I follow in my parents unhealthy footsteps. I'm doing all the unhealthy things they did."
If you ever say or think those kinds of things, you're in the right place!
Most people honestly want to live a better, happier, healthier life, they just can't make the changes they want. They've become saddled with destructive behaviors and toxic beliefs that rob them of personal satisfaction. Habits and beliefs can come from many sources: parents, friends, society, magazines, TV, movies, school, and work.
You need to heal those old, outdated, unhealthy ways of thinking and acting. That means uncovering and letting go of poisonous beliefs and patterns of communication; and breathing life into new and more healthy habits that allow you to live fully.
Here's a metaphor: I've always enjoyed reading old copies of the National Geographic magazine, from as far back as the 1920s. In the magazine, you'll see images of how the world was then - in the 1920s. However, the world has changed and you can't expect it to be like it was in pictures that are almost 100 years old. The cars, the fashion, the technology... it's all very different.
Old ways of thinking and acting, which may have been accurate and useful a long time ago, can become foolish and harmful now that things have changed. In the 1920s, people drank radioactive water as a health drink - until 1932 when a man's jaw fill off because he drank 3 bottles a day!
Likewise, you may have developed tendencies like anger, depression, or fear to help protect or calm you. And, it's safe to assume you chose the best option you recognized at the time. Unfortunately, many things we originally used - in the past - to keep ourselves safe can cause us to miss out on the happiness, connection, and love we want in the present.
Luckily, there are remedies to "heal old wounds." As you let go of unproductive beliefs and behaviors, and replace them with more nourishing and invigorating ones, you'll be surprised by the shifts you'll observe. You may discover your progress in unexpected and bewildering ways.
Who The Hell Is Chad?
Life-changing secrets of a small-town, hitchhiking, self-development nerd!
I grew up in a small town, home-schooled, with a rough home life. When I hitchhiked away from home at 17 (more on that in a second,) boy was I a mess. I lacked confidence and had poor social skills, so I was basically a shy, lonely kid. Strangely, I'd begun studying personal development when I was 13, but I'd had a hard time putting it to use to improve my life within the confines of that situation.
In front of me, I saw a life that could go one of two ways:
- I could stay around my family, in that small town, and have a miserable life that could only lead to a dead end.
- I could get the hell out of Dodge and do everything in my power to change.
So, at 17 I hitchhiked away and started a new life. I didn't "run away," I actually let my family know months in advance that I was leaving. I was excited to get away and it was like an initiation ritual for myself - it was the most important thing I ever did.
I began doing courses with a personal development company on the other side of the country. That company taught 1, 2, and 3 week-long intensive workshops exploring deeply into communication, psychology, and personal transformation. It was a life-changing experience for the participants.
After awhile, I began volunteering at the company and eventually they hired me - I worked there for about 3 years. During that time, I learned an awful lot about how people think, the secrets of how we communicate, and what it takes to make radical changes in people's lives.
Before all that I was shy, had never been on a date, was terrified of public speaking, and had no business skills. Because of the changes I made, I became a totally different person. I became a popular ballroom dancer and eventually met the lovely woman I'm with now. I've traveled all over the world and was a day-trader for 2 years. Now, I run my own businesses where I regularly lead workshops for audiences of all sizes.
Over the years, I've continued studying different fields to gain as many life-enhancing tools, strategies, and methods as possible. I've studied or taught classes in psychology, hypnosis, behavioral training, theater techniques, creativity, storytelling, personality types, learning styles, public speaking, coaching, improvisation, provocative therapy, comedy, dance, Neuro Linguistic Programming, Language Action Theory, and business.
Yeah, I'm a bit of a knowledge addict! I mix everything I've studied into a system of strategies to make people more effective at accomplishing their goals - whether you're goals are mental, emotional, physical, financial, or relationship driven.
There's no "One Size Fits All" solution. You're a unique individual and need a personalized solution. For example, if you want to connect more easily with your spouse, you almost certainly need to develop in multiple areas: beliefs, thinking, behaviors, and communication strategies. It's not one, single, isolated change; it's a system of changes. Meaning, you deserve a holistic perspective and approach personalized to you.
One more thing... A lot of people associate growth with pain, but I don't think pain is a logical cure for... pain! In fact, people will avoid changing if they think it's going to be painful. Yet, many people are programmed to believe this:
- Change = pain. "No pain, no gain!"
That's a limiting belief, so let's throw it out the window right now. While it's sometimes the case, it's all in how you approach it. I personally like to associate growth with pleasure and enjoyment, and I want you to feel learning is fun and exciting! Let's make it:
- Change = fun, connection, and humor. "If you're laughing, you're learning!"
Learning, growing, and developing as a person can be a wild thrill-ride filled with pleasure and curiosity. Because of this, I focus on a fun, humorous approach to change. I utilize strategies that make it enjoyable to change and become more effective as a person. What if you could enjoy improving your life?
"What Can I Do Next?"
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